Wednesday, September 29, 2010

There Are Still Some “Firsts”.

Taylor playing          I had to sneak this picture with my phone so she wouldn’t stop playing.

I spent part of the afternoon, sitting at my desk, looking out the big picture window, watching Taylor play on the deck.  i realize that doesn’t sound all that entertaining, but for me, it was.

You see, Taylor doesn’t “play”.  She has toys and stuff, she just never really plays with them.  About the only toy she really plays with are balls.

But today, Taylor took her Cabbage Patch dolls and a stuffed puppy and played with them.  She sat them in chairs around the outside table and put toys on the table for them.  She had several of her magazines placed in front of where “everyone” was sitting.

Taylor playing puppy

Taylor playing today would be the equivalent of a baby taking their first steps in how emotional it was for me.  At 21 years old, it looked like my daughter used her imagination for the first time.  It was amazing.

And yes…I cried.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Anti-PC Post Ahead…Proceed with Caution

ptcircus2 I realize that my voice is going to be in the extreme minority here but I feel like I need to say something. 

There are a lot of things that our lawmakers in Washington need to address…namely the fact that millions are out of work.  Our economy is still on a downward spiral.  Small business owners are being taxed like crazy.  I can vouch for the last one first hand.

Look, as the mother of a profoundly, developmentally disabled daughter, I understand the power behind words.  However, right now, taking the words “mentally retarded” out of government documents seems like a waste of Washington’s time. Click here to read the story.

There are too many families who don’t have enough food, enough money to pay their bills or house payments.  Shouldn’t we concentrate on those issues right now?

I realize that I’ve probably offended most, if not all, parents of special needs kids.  However, I just think there is a time for everything and maybe this wasn’t the right time.  We are so politically correct about everything…even to the point where sometimes I don’t even know what to “call” my child when explaining her issues to others.  You can’t say disabled, you have to say “differently-abled”.  Handicapped becomes “handi-capable”. 

These are just my personal views and I definitely don’t expect everyone to have the same.  I just feel that sometimes, people are too scared of offending someone with a differing viewpoint.  I almost didn’t post this because I was worried about what those that read here would think.  But then I realized that it’s my blog & if  I can’t voice my feelings here, where can I?

I welcome all differing opinions to comment here.  I just ask that you be respectful.  Dialogue & debate (with manners) are always appreciated.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Mothers Lie

By Lori Borgman

Expectant mothers waiting for a newborn's arrival say they don't care what sex the baby is. They just want to have ten fingers and ten toes.

Mothers lie.

Every mother wants so much more.
She wants a perfectly healthy baby with a round head, rosebud lips, button nose, beautiful eyes and satin skin.
She wants a baby so gorgeous that people will pity the Gerber baby for being flat-out ugly.

She wants a baby that will roll over, sit up and take those first steps right on schedule.

Every mother wants a baby that can see, hear, run, jump and fire neurons by the billions.

She wants a kid that can smack the ball out of the park and do toe points that are the envy of the entire ballet class.

Call it greed if you want, but a mother wants what a mother wants.
Some mothers get babies with something more.

Maybe you're one who got a baby with a condition you couldn't pronounce, a spine that didn't fuse, a missing chromosome or a palate that didn't close.

The doctor's words took your breath away.
It was just like the time at recess in the fourth grade when you didn't see the kick ball coming, and it knocked the wind right out of you.

Some of you left the hospital with a healthy bundle, then, months, even years later, took him in for a routine visit, or scheduled him for a checkup, and crashed head first into a brick wall as you bore the brunt of devastating news.

It didn't seem possible.
That didn't run in your family.

Could this really be happening in your lifetime?
There's no such thing as a perfect body.

Everybody will bear something at some time or another.
Maybe the affliction will be apparent to curious eyes, or maybe it will be unseen, quietly treated with trips to the doctor, therapy or surgery.

Mothers of children with disabilities live the limitations with them.

Frankly, I don't know how you do it.
Sometimes you mothers scare me.
How you lift that kid in and out of the wheelchair twenty times a day.

How you monitor tests, track medications, and serve as the gatekeeper to a hundred specialists yammering in your ear.

I wonder how you endure the clichés and the platitudes, the well-intentioned souls explaining how God is at work when you've occasionally questioned if God is on strike.

I even wonder how you endure schmaltzy columns like this one-saluting you, painting you as hero and saint, when you know you're ordinary.

You snap, you bark, you bite.
You didn't volunteer for this, you didn't jump up and down in the motherhood line yelling,"Choose me, God. Choose me! I've got what it takes.

You're a woman who doesn't have time to step back and put things in perspective, so let me do it for you. From where I sit, you're way ahead of the pack.

You've developed the strength of the draft horse while holding onto the delicacy of a daffodil.

You have a heart that melts like chocolate in a glove box in July, counter-balanced against the stubbornness of an Ozark mule.
You are the mother, advocate and protector of a child with a disability.

You're a neighbor, a friend, a woman I pass at church and my sister-in-law.

You're a wonder.

This is something I ran across and just had to repost.  Sometimes you come across things that just beg to be shared.  This, to me, is one of those things.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Summer Fun Video

I realize that this post can’t compete with Brandy’s sister post, but I’m hoping that some video of Taylor, Brandy, & the grandkids will at least come close.

I have to thank The Bossman for taking the time to make my video look way better than it actually is…gotta love editing.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010


roaring river with mom 030

Mom gave me an idea to write a blog on Taylor’s blog from the sister’s point of view.  I thought it was wonderful the hard part is figuring out where to start.  So I will kind of start with the beginning and see how it goes.

I remember Taylor’s nursery like I was just there, and I was only 5 when she was born and I can tell you where her brown crib was and the beautiful silk off white bedding she had.  I guess I was excited about her!!

When she was born I remember me and my older sis running in there to get her up and make her pink bottles, they were pink because she had to have medicine in them, looked like strawberry milk.  Growing up with Taylor was a wonderful experience, I don’t remember all those life threatening surgeries or choices that my mom had to go through at least not till we got way older like now.

I remember trying to get Taylor to a new accomplishment, for example I was the first to make Taylor laugh and I remember every detail and can picture that moment in my head. So me and my older sis always wanted to get her to do something else, whether it was laughing, talking, standing, or walking we just couldn’t wait to get her there.   I do remember teaching her to say “boobies”, I was a good sister but I wasn’t perfect.  I also remember Taylor loved to stand on the furniture facing the back and we would duck down on the other side and play with her but let me tell you if she got your hair that was the end of it..ouch!

My main point with this one is being the sibling of a special needs child like Taylor we are the lucky ones, growing up with them we get to have all the fun and none of the worries like the parents do.  I can’t be 100% sure but I can’t recall a time that I was ever jealous of Taylor and the attention she got, either it’s that I was so darn good or I was raised right! 

I hope you enjoyed this sister blog and look out for my next one, I already have what I will write in mind!

Thanks, from the sister of Taylor